


i've got news for you doc... i'm mr scars

by Scourgefan12



Category: Hellsing
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-25
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:55:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27703763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scourgefan12/pseuds/Scourgefan12
Summary: While he and Jan are spending time together, Doc makes a little discovery.
Relationships: The Doctor/Jan Valentine
Kudos: 2





	i've got news for you doc... i'm mr scars

Jan was curled up next to Doc, head resting snugly against his chest. Likewise, Doc had an arm wrapped around Jan, holding him close.

They'd recently finished spending the night together, in the sexual sense. Now they were going to spend the rest of it together in the normal way.

This most likely meant that they were going to sleep together. Or more accurately, Doc would sleep while Jan just hung out, doing whatever it was he did while Doc was unavailable.

That was something Doc had noticed during their time together, Jan rarely seemed to actually sleep. It was hard to gauge whether this was something that persisted while they were apart, but it was certainly a thing when they were spending time together. Even if they weren't doing anything, just lying together in silence, Jan would stay awake. Occasionally he'd doze off for a bit, but the slightest sound or movement would jolt him awake again.

Doc supposed this wasn't exactly a problem, vampires didn't need as much sleep as humans anyway. Technically they didn't _need_ sleep at all, unlike humans they weren't in danger of dying if they went too long without it, they just usually functioned better with it. However, they especially didn't need it if they were taking in as much blood as they should, which Jan certainly was.

Jan drank far more than he needed actually, as far as Doc could tell. When he was unable to go out he would help himself to Millennium's stock of blood bags, taking multiple for each meal of the day and usually doing this at least three times per day.

When he was able to go out, he took great joy in hunting. During the times where Doc felt the need to monitor him (Which was often, he wasn't foolish enough to just leave Jan to wreak havoc without some form of caution, someone had to make sure Jan wasn't stirring up unnecessary trouble.) he would witness Jan tearing through entire groups of people. The number of people he drained could easily reach the double digits, and on top of that he would usually end up eating part of the bodies too. He'd consume organs, chunks of flesh. If he was feeling especially ravenous he'd finish entire limbs, bone and all. Needless to say, it was a mess.

On the surface this seemed like it might be a problem. Overindulgence wasn't good for you, even if you were a mostly immortal creature who wouldn't have the negative consequences of doing so hit you as hard as they would a human. Doc, however, couldn't find it in himself to be overly concerned. After all, this was certainly much better than when Jan first joined Millennium.

Jan used to be a scrawny little thing. The clothes he wore were usually baggy enough to hide it, but take those away and it would be abundantly clear. His shoulder blades and hips would be protruding, you would be able to count his ribs. He hadn't seemed like he was in danger of starving to death or anything, but regardless it wasn't a pretty sight. It reminded Doc of himself almost, except unlike Jan he never saw any reason to try and cover it up.

Doc was happy to see Jan put a little meat on his bones, even if his methods of doing so were a bit excessive. 

He ran one of his fingers down the curve of Jan's spine, smiling a little to himself at the fact that he couldn't feel any of the vertebrae sticking out. Not without pressing down a bit harder, at least. Yes, this was definitely an improvement.

As he was doing this, he was distracted from his thoughts by a voice. "'Kay, I'm gonna be honest. If you're trying to feel me up right now, you're doing a real shitty job."

Doc barely resisted the urge to roll his eyes, only succeeding in not doing so because he knew Jan wouldn't see it. "Well, you'll be relieved to know that's not what I was doing." Seriously, it couldn't have even been ten whole minutes yet. Surely Jan couldn't actually want to go for another round already.

"Okay... So, the fuck were you doing, then?" Jan sounded accusatory, but Doc wasn't fazed. That's just how questions from him tended to sound, he was most likely just curious.

Doc still went quiet for a bit, because really, how was he supposed to answer that? He couldn't simply share his thoughts, he doubted Jan would appreciate him bringing up the past. Before and very soon after Jan had joined Millennium clearly wasn't a great point in his life, which was likely why he and his brother had joined in the first place, so things could improve.

He could instead say something nice and sweet, either in the form of an answer or as a way of avoiding the question. However, this would probably result in Jan making fun of him for being "too sappy". And sure, he knew that Jan didn't mean anything by it. In fact, he suspected that Jan actually liked hearing these kinds of things, and only poked fun because he was flustered. Still, Doc wasn't really in the mood to deal with that.

He could also say nothing, that was always an option. Unfortunately, if he did that then Jan would undoubtedly just pester him for an answer.

Looking at his options, Doc went with what was hopefully the best one. "Don't worry about it."

For a moment he was sure Jan would protest, insist on getting a real answer. He even pulled away a little, enough to give Doc an inquisitive look. After a few seconds though, he just sighed. "Man, fine. Whatever."

Doc muttered a small thanks, because really, Jan taking a hint and dropping a subject was rare enough to earn that. Positive reinforcement and all. 

It seemed Jan was content to shut up entirely and just go back to resting and being held, giving a quiet noise of acknowledgement before letting his eyes slip shut.

And so, Doc went back to thinking. Once again his mind wandered to Jan, this time specifically how peaceful the other seemed.

Back when their relationship had first started, Jan hardly ever seemed truly calm. Even after nights of passion, when he should have been at least a little tired out. He would be be very fidgety, tossing and turning in his spot next to Doc. On top of that, he would insist on trying to fill the silence. Even if Doc was about ready to nod off and obviously not in the mood for conversation, he'd just keep talking.

That is, if he stayed long enough to do that. A lot of the time, Jan would just end up leaving very soon after they were done having sex, usually not showing up again until sometime the next day.

Doc rarely pushed him to stay. If Jan wanted to stick around then he would, no need to force it. Besides, he probably had his reasons to want to be alone.

It seemed Doc was being rewarded for his patience. Over time, Jan left less and less. And now, he was okay with just... existing in each others presence. He was much less restless, just letting himself relax without feeling the need to make the fact that he was still around obnoxiously clear. If his previous reluctance was an issue of trust, then he now trusted Doc enough to just let himself be.

Once again, Doc allowed himself a small smile. It was nice, he was glad Jan had managed to warm up to him so much.

He normally didn't let himself get overly sentimental, 'overly' being the act of letting himself feel the emotion at all. He didn't see the point. Most everything about his current life was temporary and he knew it, and was fine with it. His experiments and creations were made for the sole purpose of dying. Millennium was only formed so that they could kick off one last big war, one that would more likely than not result in the deaths of the majority of its members. It would be stupid to let himself get attached with this knowledge in mind.

There were very few exceptions to this. One was Schrodinger, and that was mainly because Schrodinger couldn't die, not really. And if somehow something _did_ manage to permanently kill him, it would require some insane string of events that would probably result in Doc's own death too. So, there was no risk in letting himself get attached to Schrodinger.

Plus, unlike any of Doc's other creations, he'd raised the young boy much like a son. It would be difficult to just make himself not feel anything.

Another exception was the Major, and this was only very rarely. Major was planning to die in the upcoming war, Doc was completely sure of that. However, the two of them had known each other since early in the second world war. Doc was almost presumptuous enough to say that they were friends. This was another case of it simply being too hard to just shut his feelings off.

The final exception was Jan. This wasn't something he'd wanted to happen, but Jan had just refused to leave him alone. They spent so much time together, getting to know each other and eventually forming a relationship, that Jan had somehow managed to worm his way into Doc's heart. He doubted he could stop caring about Jan at this point if he tried. This would definitely come back to bite him sometime in the future, but that was fine. He was going to enjoy it while he could.

Doc moved the hand that was still resting at Jan's back and brushed it along the vampire's face, cupping his cheek. 

Jan cracked open his eyes, but otherwise didn't give much response.

Doc was tempted to brush some of the hair out of Jan's face, but resisted the urge. Jan hated people touching his hair, and as close as they were Doc was sure that applied to him too. Even something small like that would be very unappreciated, and he didn't want to upset Jan.

He also kind of wanted to scold Jan for not taking out any of his piercings before lying down, because really, you'd think someone who had so many would know how to properly take care of them. At least take out the ones in his ears, that couldn't be comfortable. He didn't do this either though, not wanting to break the silence.

For now, Doc was content to just keep looking at Jan, taking in the image of him. Just enjoying being around him, really.

While he was doing this, he noticed a little something. Right around Jan's temple, a bit of raised flesh, colored somewhat different from the rest of his skin. A scar, maybe?

Doc brought his hand up to gently feel the area and, yep, that was definitely scar tissue. Hmm. Well, that confirmed that, while being a vampire prevented you from gaining any new scars, it didn't get rid of the ones you already had. Which wasn't really something that Doc wondered too much about, but it was nice to have it confirmed anyway.

Doc was kind of surprised at himself for being able to notice it, honestly. There wasn't much there, just a little speck. Combine that with the fact that he didn't have his glasses on and the room was already fairly dim, he was actually kind of impressed with himself.

Jan nudged Doc's hand out of the way, feeling the area for himself. Probably trying to see what Doc was so focused on, what all the fuss was about. Once he ran a finger around the scarred area, his eyes opened the rest of the way, widening in realization. Or shock, or perhaps both.

Jan let out a little chuckle. (Forced, a little nervous. But Doc wasn't going to say anything.) "Shit, you're probably wondering how I got this, huh?"

Well, yes. Of course. He hadn't planned on asking though, Jan had made it clear in the past that anything about his life before joining Millennium wasn't any of Doc's business, getting angry and defensive at even the most innocuous lines of questioning. And that had clearly happened before he'd joined the organization.

"It's a pretty funny story, actually." It seemed, despite any previous misgivings, Jan was going to share. "When I was younger I used to be really into parkour. Running around the city, flipping around and shit, you know?"

Yes, Doc knew what parkour was. He had a pretty good grasp of the English language. Better than Jan did, he often felt like.

"I'd practice that shit night and day, thought I got pretty good at it after a while." Jan laughed again, this time managing to sound more natural. "I was still just a kid though, and a fuckin' stupid one. Didn't really have any idea what I was doing." He sat up a little as he got into his story, the blanket that had been wrapped around him falling to his hips.

Doc sat up too. Why not? He probably wasn't getting to sleep any time soon. Plus, he should show that he was paying attention, was actually engaged.

"One day I was just doing my thing, business as usual, you know? Thought I was real fuckin' cool, ended up going a little too far." He paused, either to think or for dramatic effect. It was hard to tell. "Don't wanna go into detail, but I ate shit. Fell flat on my face, thought I cracked my skull open. Luke had to look after me for a while and... heh, he sure as fuck didn't let me keep doing any of that after I was fixed up."

Doc nodded slowly, processing what he'd been told. It took him no time at all to come to the conclusion that nearly everything Jan had just said to him was a complete lie. There might've been _some_ truth in there, such as Jan's brother having to tend to him after he received his injury, but the whole thing just seemed far too fishy.

The biggest hole was the fact that the scar was very obviously not on Jan's face, it was on the side of his head. And sure, Jan might've just worded it that way to make it sound more interesting, but still.

That... was the only actual flaw Doc could find, if he was being honest. The only other evidence he had for Jan lying was really just gut instinct. It didn't sound real to him. He'd heard Jan go on many tangents about personal experiences, and this didn't match up with those.

If this was something Jan had come up with on the spot, it was a pretty good lie. He had to praise Jan's unusually quick thinking. 

Or, there was the possibility that this was a tale Jan had prepared in advance, just in case anyone asked about that particular scar. That seemed unlikely, because the odds of anyone seeing it in the first place were slim, not to mention the chance of anyone actually caring enough to ask. But Jan was a strange person, so Doc wouldn't put something like that past him.

"You're right, that was quite the story." Doc decided to not let Jan know that he saw through it, that would just cause more trouble than anything. "It seems your brother couldn't keep you away from the practice for good, though." Doc was, of course, referring to Jan's current fighting style. He had a tendency to leap around and flip through the air, even when such a thing wasn't remotely necessary, obviously just doing it to show off.

Jan gave a little shrug. "Yeah well, we're vampires now. No point in trying to stop me, not like anything I do will kill me."

"Good point, and considering your job now, it would be in your best interest to at least try practicing such a thing."

"Yeah, that's what I said!" Jan's excitement seemed real, if nothing else. Maybe he was just glad Doc was supposedly buying what he was saying, or maybe there was some truth here as well. Maybe Luke really had stopped him from doing any sort of dangerous gymnastics such as parkour before they'd joined Millennium. 

"A wise decision on his part, you've ended up getting very good at it." Seriously, one of the only people who could match Jan's agility was Luke. Jan clearly knew what he was doing.

Jan _beamed_ at the praise. "Yeah, thanks. Been working real hard, you know."

Jan's joy was somewhat infectious, Doc couldn't help but be happy that he was happy.

The two of them went back and forth like that for a bit, discussing things like Jan's current training regiment and recent assignments and such. Doc made sure to let Jan know that he was doing a good job, because he loved seeing Jan light up at the acknowledgement, but also because it was true. Jan may be quite difficult sometimes, but he deserved credit where credit was due.

At some point, Doc's eyes began to wander. Not on purpose, it just... happened. While this was happening, he came across another certain little something. This one was around the right-side area of Jan's ribs.

Curiosity got the better of him, and Doc carefully traced a finger along it. "So, how did you get this one?"

Jan looked down to where Doc's hand was, and for a moment his face darkened. The excited gleam in his eye disappeared and his grin stuttered, his expression going blank.

Doc was worried, obviously. He hadn't wanted to anger or upset Jan. He'd just assumed that since Jan had been willing to talk about the other scar, then that would be the case for this one too. He was getting ready to take back the question when Jan spoke.

"Oh man, that's a wild one." Jan regained his composure startlingly fast, once again seeming more than glad to share. "You're not gonna fuckin' believe it."

That was for sure, but Doc wanted to hear what Jan would come up with anyway. If Jan was really okay with that. He raised an eyebrow, feigning intrigue. Although he supposed it wasn't really that fake, he was genuinely interested, just not for the reason that Jan would assume. "Well, now I'm really curious."

"Okay okay, so." Jan gave an enthused chuckle, leaning a bit closer. "To start us off, I should say that the neighborhood I grew up in fucking sucked, so keep that in mind."

That sounded like the truth, that was a conclusion Doc had come to on his own before. He nodded, signaling that he was listening.

"So it was like the start of the evening, 'kay? Little fourteen year old me was walkin' home from school, minding my own business." He gave a small pause. "Like for real. I know usually when I say I was minding my own business I was actually starting some shit, but this time it's true, this was before I became the little shit I am now, okay?"

"Mhm, I believe you." He really did, he doubted Jan could've been such a troublemaker his entire life. "And what happened while you were minding your own business?"

"Right so, I was just trying to get home, when outta nowhere this son of a bitch fuckin' jumps me. Never seen him before in my life, but I could tell he was a pussy cause like, what grown ass man goes after a kid?" 

There were a few types who might, all of them making Doc relieved that this story was probably false.

"Anyway I think he was after money, but jokes on him cause I didn't have none. Seriously, what did he expect? I must've only looked like I was twelve." Jan laughed again, whether it was at his own expense or at the mystery man's was hard to tell. "I was holding out pretty good somehow, and I guess he didn't like that cause the crazy fuck decided to pull a knife on me!"

Oh. Doc could see where this was going.

"Obviously he got me by surprise, I wasn't expecting that shit. I was able to kick his ass, but not before he got a good stab in." Jan brushed a hand along the scar. "And... yeah, that's how I got this baby."

Doc was even more sure than before that Jan was full of shit. He could believe Jan growing up in a bad neighborhood, maybe even getting attacked once or twice, but he could _not_ believe that was how Jan had gotten that scar.

Now, Doc wasn't an expert (Except wait! He was!) but there was no way in hell that what he was looking at was caused by being stabbed. Doc had seen plenty of injuries in his day, he knew what a stab wound, as well as the aftermath of one, looked like.

If he had to guess, the real cause was blunt force trauma, which had resulted in one of the ribs cracking or breaking. Why Jan had decided to include a knife fight in his story instead of just claiming that the stranger had hit him hard enough to break a bone, Doc really didn't know. Did he just think it sounded cooler this way? Did he seriously think Doc, the certified doctor, wouldn't be able to figure out the truth?

Well, no matter. It wasn't like he was about to call Jan out on the lie. Judging by Jan's reaction upon seeing the scar again in the first place, he probably had a good reason to not want to dwell on whatever had actually happened. 

"It sounds like you got pretty lucky." He offered a response. "Any hesitation on your part and he could've got you in one of your vitals." Ignoring the fact that getting stabbed in the ribs _would_ be vital. 

"Well, yeah. I wasn't about to let a little bitch like that kill me." Jan crossed his arms, looking rather smug. "If I'm gonna die, it's gonna be way more badass than that."

Now _that_ was the truth. If and when Jan died, it was going to be extremely dramatic. He was going to go out with style.

"That's all well and good, but don't go dying anytime soon. We still need you." That and Doc would miss him if he were to die, but he wasn't going to mention that.

It seemed like it didn't need to be said for Jan to pick up on it. "Don't you worry, babe. I ain't going anywhere."

Jan's reassurance meant very little, since he wasn't the one who was in charge of deciding whether he died or not, but it was comforting nonetheless. 

The two of them settled down soon after that, going back to what they'd been doing. As they were lying there, Doc let his eyes wander along Jan's body. He spotted a few more scars littered here and there, but didn't say anything. He'd heard enough, and he was sure Jan was fed up with having to talk about them. Not that anyone was forcing him, but still.

Plus, Doc didn't want to ruin the peace and quiet a second time. He was more than happy to just let himself drift off, Jan in his arms. Maybe Jan would manage to get some rest too at some point, that would be pretty nice.

**Author's Note:**

> You really think Jan would do that? Just go up to his bf and start telling lies?  
> I wrote almost all of this on virtually no sleep, but despite that I rlly like how it turned out
> 
> Anyway, for anyone who gets the reference in the title, please know that I hate Adam Rosner's guts <3 But the title was funny, so y'know


End file.
